paranoia.

2011-08-09T15:55:00.001+08:00

2011-05-19T15:00:00.001+08:00

2011-04-17T20:45:00.001+08:00

THIS GRL RIGHT HERE IS STARTING SCH TMR :O

life as it is

2011-03-30T16:10:00.002+08:00

gna blog cos i'm bored n have completely NOTHING to do :/

alright, hi? it's Wednesday n i'm not working tday hehe reason i took off is cos we're heading to kakak it's later for min's tuition n for me to play with rayyan baby!!!!

OK anyway, as you can see, i've permed my hair. yes, i permed it on impulse n i must say i'm getting quite used to my curls! kinda missing my straight hair tho... HAIS

err what else? oh yeh i'm still contemplating if i shld head for the camp or not..... jizz, maybe i shld la hor? ok.

ntg else to blog about la i'm just so bored n i'm too lazy to blog abt life. it's alr mundane as it is. i've no life. all i do is eat sleep work play the laptop and the cycle keeps on repeating itself... i just cant wait for sch pls!!

oh yah the thing abt texting right...... i just am used to getting late replies la. it's totally not cool but..... I CAN LIVE WITH IT LA I GUESS PPL ARE JUST NOT LIKE ME I REPLY TEXTS LIKE 30 SECS AFTER I RECEIVE THEM LOR -.-

sorry but am lazy to like spell everything out when i blog. lol.

K LA BYE NEXT TIME I BLOG I HOPE MY ENTRY WILL BE INTERESTING KAYS HAIS BYE

Running Late

2011-03-29T15:28:00.000+08:00

OK HI BTW THE PICTURE BELOW THIS ENTRY *LOOKS DOWN* IS HOW MY HAIR IS, CURRENTLY HEHEHE YES, I PERMED IT :B

anyway it's almost 330 alr n i'm supposed to get ready for work booo ok so i'll update when i have the time yah?

SCHOOL'S GNA START SOON YEZZARRRRR!

KTHXBYE

2011-03-26T22:57:00.000+08:00

Annoyed

2011-03-07T23:05:00.000+08:00

Hi. At this moment, i'm quite annoyed. Ok, let's blog for a bit so you'll know the reason why i'm feeling annoyed. Let's start.

So earlier on, both me n mama headed to RP (the school i'm gna attend in April) to enrol n get myself a laptop. So... we did. I got myself a Fujitsu lifebook. So when i configured the laptop in school, it had no problems connecting to the network there. Then once i was home, i was trying to connect it to the network at home but failed terribly.. So i called up Singtel. The person who ATTEMPTED to help me FAILED TERRIBLY, as well. Not only did he fail in helping me out, he also wasted more than 30 minutes of my life. I'd like to show him the finger for wasting my time n making me go thru such a hassle. You dont wna know what i had to go thru.... So hey, Singtel dude, you should bloody well quit your job. You're hopeless kthxbye!

OK ENUF OF BEING PISSED ALR JAJA!!!! Remind me to call Fujitsu up pls thx

K BAI

baby i just wna dance... i dont rlly care.

2011-03-03T21:02:00.000+08:00

HELLO HELLO HI HI HEY HEY

it's time for another entry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *jumps*

lol i'm so lame i deserve an award for being the lamest girl around plssss oke oke what to blog about eh? btw not gna caps the first letter of every sentence cos i'm lazy yay me -.-

hm work's been super tiring. like rlly. worked full shift ytd n my feet are swollen.. RLLY. then again, ytd was a pretty bad day. super screwed cos i fought with 3 ppl. in the end, my day turned out to be alright afterall thx to my customers!!!! love you all who make me feel appreciated without even trying *hugs n kisses*

hm anyway it's my off day tday!!!!! followed mama out to fetch min n had ayam penyet ria but then again i had bawal penyet so lolololol k then then we went home n i napped till almost 7pm hehe i love off days!!!!

ok got to remind myself to clean my room bfre going out to meet my darling #1234 girls for bowling n probably dinner yay sayang semuanya *inserts heart here*

been listening to the same song over n over again lol i forgot how to put songs on my blog la shizzzz k dah la bye

Trust issues

2011-02-18T03:06:00.000+08:00

You know what sucks?

Not being able to sleep cos there's just something that's on your mind.. N no matter how hard you try, it wont leave you alone. Instead, it haunts n makes it difficult for you to rest your eyes n mind. A name or thought can trigger unwanted memories n feelings that you dont ever wna have, again cos you dont wna have to go thru the excruciating pain all over again... Unpleasant moments will be remembered n thought of yet again.. It's just a damn vicious cycle n it wont ever stop repeating so you wont ever stop feeling the pain. You would have to spend a long time getting used to it bfre you can finally move on n you cant help but to wonder how long it'll take....

This is EXACTLY what i'm feeling right now. I cant rest my eyes or mind cos i'm stuck in the past. I have LOTS of negativity around me n that obviously sucks. Things have occured n broke me as a whole. I'm just now fragments of the broken pieces. Ppl shld know that i despise being lied to.... I rlly CANNOT stand liars. Especially if i've been extremely nice to them. I rlly dont expect to be lied to, at all. Worst, if they have been lying to me ALL THE TIME but i still forgive n treat them nicely (thinking they will change/have changed)

Then again, a leopard wont ever change its spots, right? Just as i thought..

So i have decided to be dumbest girl alive if i ever trust (them liars again)... I dont wna make the same mistakes n go thru the cycle yet again. You can only make mistakes once, like they say.. If you make it twice (or more), it's a choice.. Hmm

Just when i thought i'd be alot happier if i start anew n forget the past..... I'm being greeted with disappointment, yet again. To be honest, i've kind of lost faith in love... N friends, altogether..

Oh wellssssss guess i've got to get used to the hurt n pain life slaps me in the face with...... This is life, jaja.. Welcome?

Alright guess i'll TRY n sleep now. Typing this long entry via iphone's pretty tiring.... You know?

Gdnight fellow readers (if i have any -.-) xx

And tonight I'll stay home and miss you more than you'll ever know

2011-02-13T20:25:00.000+08:00

OK, hi?

The reason for blogging is pretty simple n clear cut.... I'm bored!!!!! For the love of god.. Hm, so i spent my Sunday by.... NOT GOING TO RELIGIOUS CLASS HAHAHAHAHA OK no.. So i had to wake up at like 11 to clean the entire wardrobe.. The previous owner came n collected it (TOGETHER WITH MY BED THANKS TO MAMA) lolololol so now i'm sleeping on a matress... on the floor! SO JERITAN SEPI-ISH LOR

K then i napped till about errrr 5.30, i suppose.. Took a bath n ate like 2 pieces of bread with otah.. That's practically the only thing i ate... Besides like 8 pieces (VERY SMALL PIECES) of sotong charquay? Hm, they're super delish... I like!!!

Downloaded for the mother, skype on the computer lol that's practically my day!! Can you see the point in blogging now? Hm anyway i've to like set a budget cos i'm going shopping reaaaaal soon damn grllll gna bid some $$$ gdbye :(

HOW SAD???? VERY!!!!!

Been listening to this song... Over n over n over again jizz i think i've listened to it for the billionth time alr lol jk stupid

Think i'm gna spend about $300 max on shopping (i doubt it)

Need to get:

SHOES

JEANS

HAIR STRAIGHTENER (maybe i can get this next month with my next pay lol)

BAGS

MAKEUP (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA i'm not kidding o.o)

OK i think i needa get some more stuffs but i'm not pretty sure what yet... So i'll be working again yessss come to me $$$

OH.. FYI, i no longer have a #bbf. So long n gdbye to you i nvr wna speak of you alr GUDABAIIIIII

HAIYA nobody to entertain me i'm bored!!!!! Can't you tell? Hehehehe ok i shld stop..

KTHXBYE

And tonight I'll stay home and miss you more than you'll ever know

2011-02-12T22:23:00.000+08:00

HELLO HOW DO YOU LIKE MY NEW BLOGSKIN?!?!

TEEHEEHEE OMG I CANT BELIEVE I SPENT MORE THAN................. AN HOUR ON THIS!!!!!!! :(

anyway, i'm happy with the outcome of it so fuckyeahgirlxtupai ♥

2011-02-10T20:56:00.000+08:00

HI I'M HAPPY TODAY COS MY PAY'S HERE ALR HEHEHEHE

2011-01-27T12:09:00.000+08:00

Picture above was taken during work! Love my girls alot ♥ ♥ ♥ Oh yes btw, this picture is incomplete cos Suzs wasn't with us! Complete picture will be uploaded in the next entry oke? :)

So hi, i'm currently pissed cos i wasted like 2 hours of my life on the damn printer.. In the end, i didn't even manage to poke the hole to refill the ink... USELESS. Yes, i'm feeling so very useless atm!! :(

Anyway, i've been thinking... I'm not going to work for a week at SG.. Will i still get my pay? :/ I mean, it's only THIS week (n the week i got my results) that i'm not working and i've yet to quit so i SHOULD get my pay, right? Ok fine, i'll wait till the 31st and see if i get it or not... If i don't...... HAIS

Stressed out about my pay! I don't know why........ K maybe i shld give SG a call and probably work on the 31st? HAHA maybe i shldddd... We'll see.

K LA BYE

2011-01-25T00:24:00.000+08:00

It's currently 12:27AM and i'm updating you, darling blog of mine :) I can't sleep cos i just had my supper hehehe so yah, let's update you la hor?

So now, i've been working at Expo for the Robinson's sale! It's quite alright la but i love the pay the most! HEHEHE gna have to resign from SG soon cos i am probably getting a new job. I love you SG but i got to leave..... soon :(

Life's been pretty alright, lately. I've nothing much to blog about LOL i'm a no lifer... Everyday i eat > work > play computer > sleep! -.-

Results of my course's gna be released tmr! WISH ME LUCKKKK pls ♥

Oke i guess that's all..... Need to sleep soon cos i'm heading out for brunch with darlings des and fanaa :B

2011-01-19T18:15:00.000+08:00

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII :B

i'm back to update you like i used to hehehehe happy or not?! ok fine i've zero readers anyway so it's just me, myself, i and you, darling blog :P

so, what's upppppp? the sky. tet! i'm working.... at SG! but it's currently renovating so i'm working for robinson's sales at expo!! super exciting right my life?! YOU JUST JEALOUS~~~

working at SG has been really awesome!!!!!!!!!! i love my SG people ♥ ♥ ♥

LOL i dont know what to blog about actually! i've no life already la *pouts*

K BYE!! BLOG SOON :B

2010-11-24T16:39:00.000+08:00

Hi! I'm in the mood to blog right now :) I'm just done with bathing and am feeling so fresh right now! I had an hour nap and i've yet to eat since yesterday. Only thing i consumed yesterday was bandung ice blended with pearls yuuuuum and the only thing i consumed today was half a cup of milo hehehe yes i'm seriously not going to eat till i lose 30kg...

I'm kidding, idiots. I'm not going to eat till i'm left with bones. Hehehe. Okay so what's been happening eh? I've had my heart broken too many times and surprisingly, it didn't break just now, when i found out some stuffs... I guess i'm already used to it and my heart's numb. By the way, girls, do trust your gut feeling more than your boyfriend's words, okay? Seriously, don't be fooled by their honey coated words. What they're telling you are all bullshit. Take it from me. Trust your gut more than their words. I'm telling youuuuu~

So, i bought hair dye. I'm not sure if it's going to turn out alright. I'm going to a salon to get it done anyway. I think we're going on aunty rachel's yatch this Saturday for i don't know whaaaaat -_-' I feel like watching a movie! Who's going to be my company? ^^

I want to work. But i can't start anytime soon because i'll be going on a holiday on the 8th of December. Sooooo, yeh? I am considering Starbucks. It's sha's workplace so yehhh i will probably work there? I'm still contemplating, actually. Anyway, i'm getting $50 for babysitting aiman and yasmin for 3 days! HEHEHEHE.

What else is there to blog about eh? I've got no idea already :( Ahhh the lyrics below's for somebody who has been a complete liar. He has lied to me so many times and i want him to know that this. is. it. I am totally done with your bullshit. I'm gone and there's no way you're going to get me back. Try breaking down the walls i've built around me. I promise that you can't hurt me anymore, boy. You can't hurt me anymore :)

Anyway the song's happy ending! (For those who don't know la)

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

(Oh, oh)

Lets talk this over

It's not like we're dead

Was it something I did?

Was it something you said?

Don't leave me hanging

In a city so dead

Held up so high

On such a breakable thread

You were all the things I thought I knew

And I thought we could be

You were everything, everything

That I wanted

We were meant to be, supposed to be

But we lost it

All of our memories so close to me

Just fade away

All this time you were pretending

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

You've got your dumb friends

I know what they say

They tell you I'm difficult

But so are they

But they don't know me

Do they even know you?

All the things you hide from me

All the stuff that you do?

You were all the things I thought I knew

And I thought we could be

You were everything, everything

That I wanted

We were meant to be, supposed to be

But we lost it

All of our memories so close to me

Just fade away

All this time you were pretending

So much for my happy ending

It's nice to know that you were there

Thanks for acting like you cared

And making me feel like I was the only one

It's nice to know we had it all

Thanks for watching as I fall

And letting me know we were done

He was everything, everything

That I wanted

We were meant to be, supposed to be

But we lost it

All of the memories so close to me

Just fade away

All this time you were pretending

So much for my happy ending

You were everything, everything

That I wanted

We were meant to be, supposed to be

But we lost it

All of the memories so close to me

Just fade away

All this time you were pretending

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

So much for my happy ending

(Oh, oh, oh, oh)

2010-11-22T14:25:00.000+08:00

hi, i'm back? :/

I wish i didn't came back, although it feels so good to be sleeping on my bed..... i'm feeling disappointed, sad, heartbroken n everything else, all at the same time. i don't know what's wrong with me.. i shouldn't feel this way but why am i?

ANYWAY, the trip was awesome! it was bittersweet but it sure was a good experience! Now, my thighs are aching and my throat is sore :(

Sometimes, ignorance is not bliss.

2010-11-15T23:25:00.000+08:00

I FUCKING MISS YOU GIRLS :'(

2010-11-15T18:06:00.000+08:00

Hey, today's Monday and i'm feeling the Monday blues.. It's seriously annoying me. I don't know why but i feel like today's a bad day and i want it to be over... right now. Anyway, i've successfully stayed home today. I woke up at about 11plus and had this mini tiff with mama but i love her, anyway. Adik was being such a darling today! He bought me and min food from Macs :') I attempted folding clothes today and i think i've done quite a good job! Except that some of them aren't folded as how they're meant to be, i think? Who cares? I'm going to be $5 richer! Not that i'm anywhere close to being.... rich -.- And to make things better, i had a chat with my girls!!! Yes, we had a chat and we're thinking of bowling tomorrow! ;)

I'm currently feeling hungry.. I don't know why my tears are rolling down my cheeks. I guess i'm feeling too emotional right now and words can't express the disappointment i have within me. Every single body part of mine is aching so bad right now. Even my heart is. I thought the heart is said to be the strongest organ of the human body. So can anybody tell me why it's breaking, right now? Why does it appear to be so weak? It's supposed to be the strongest! The contradiction....

I've been feeling down, lately. How now, brown cow? :(

2010-11-14T21:16:00.000+08:00

Eh hi? I'm currently feeling so bloody annoyed with the whole world. So very annoyed. No words can express how annoyed i'm bloody feeling!! -.-

Anyway, i'm back from the outing i had with the cousins, aunty, cik ron and of course darling rayyan aqil ♥ So my cousin in law to be fetched and cousin fetched me at about 3PM and we headed to Vivo. Walked around for abit and met up with the rest to have lunch at Fig& Olive. I didn't like my marinara :( So anyway, rayyan, aunty and cik ron came afterwards and i hugged and kissed rayyan like crazy!!!!! I MISS THAT BOY LA OMG :') Hehehe then i got to carry him while walking and i'm sure people thought of me as his mother or something because they were glaring at me and rayyan like i'm a teenage mother of one -.- Afterwards, we chilled at Starbucks for abit and rayyan slept there lol he's too cute can!! -_-' Walked around with rayyan (again) for abit and got so many unwanted stares mehhh parted with a big sloppy hard kiss (for rayyan, of course) and they sent me home. I slept in the car and now i'm feeling fresh... I think.

So today was a mixture of pure bliss and misery. I'm really annoyed. I just want to say i'm no longer interested in boys. I don't want to get hurt. I don't want to fall so hard i have to struggle to get back on my feet, by myself. I don't want to so you boys better not make me. Oh and here's a _|_ for YOU. You should know who you are, right? You "made" my day -.-

Okay i guess i'm done with blogging. No pictures for today because i was in no mood to snap pictures like i usually would. Screw all of you. I don't give a flying fish.

2010-11-13T20:53:00.000+08:00

HIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :B

Firstly, i want to say screw the challenge because i'm lazy to do it already. Yes, i'm such a loser because i can't even complete such a simple challenge.. Oh and yes, i took more than 30 days to complete it so screw me, ok? I don't care, anyway :)

I'm all smiles today because of mainly a few reasons!

1) O's finally over!!!!!!!

2) 121110's one of the most memorable nights i've ever had in my entire life!

3) I've been heading out and spending so much time with the Yeangs ♥

4) I'm going to try to keep this space alive hehe (notice the word try, ok?)

5) I've been eating once a day in dying hopes of losing weight!!

Alright. Those are mainly the reasons why i'm in such a happy mood right now. I'm smiling.. That's good, right? Oh, and notice that i'm no longer blogging in short form? HAHA i don't know why but i've decided to blog like this as of today! Mehhh, anyway, my body's aching because i went swimming earlier on with the Yeangs :) I had fun today. Thank you, beloved family ♥

121110; A night the party animal in me was unleashed :P I can't believe i danced outside the four walls of my room! I think i looked drunk because a senior asked me if i was mabuk or what? LOL? :P I was high on soft drinks HAHAHAHA ok i can't imagine myself clubbing next year because i woke up with my back and legs aching :( O M G CAN'T WAIT TO CLUB NEXT YEAR!!!!!!!!!!! (NOT) Anyway, it was seriously a sad, memorable and good night. (SO LAZY TO UPLOAD PICS LEH) I had fun and i'm sure the whole of TKSS did too :') I love my principal so much. I'll be good, Mr Singh. I will :') Thanks for making me cry, by the way!!! I love TKSS, i really love you so ♥

I'll be heading to Vietnam for a camp! It's going to be a mini getaway for me and my friends!! I'm so looking forward to it hehehe! Afterwards, i'll be dying my hair white! (-.-) I'm kidding, idiots. I hope to be working pretty soon because O's finally over!!!! I'm relieved (and a tad bit scared for results HAHAHA)

I think i've blogged alot already. It's time to stop. I'm tired and my show's going to start soon HEHEHE PERSONAL TASTE ROCKS!!!! :P

And no, i'm not a korean drama addict -.-

I'll blog tomorrow, ok? See you :)

2 years/24 months

2010-11-04T11:32:00.000+08:00

hey ex, here's to 2 years of love, hurt, bliss, memories n everything else in between. i dedicate love the way you lie part 2 to us...

"i try to run but I don't wanna ever leave"

xx jaja

day 17| a habit that you wish you didn’t have

2010-10-09T12:31:00.001+08:00

biting my damn nails hais sad life

day 18| describe your sleeping arrangements: bedding, stuffed animals, whatever

2010-10-09T12:31:00.000+08:00

i sleep with a pink dolphin and 2 pink pillows on bed. oh and face down too..

day 13| a movie that makes you cry

2010-10-09T12:30:00.003+08:00

um khabi khushi khabi gham BAHAHA

day 14| what i would find in your bag

2010-10-09T12:30:00.002+08:00

hp, wallet, rubbish that i'm too lazy to throw yehhh

day 15| a question you hate to be asked

2010-10-09T12:30:00.001+08:00

um why

day 16| describe a daily ritual

2010-10-09T12:30:00.000+08:00

sch > home > computer > study fr abit > text > sleep

day 10| something you want to improve in your life

2010-10-09T12:29:00.002+08:00

i want to improve my relationship with my parents :')

day 11| favorite article of clothing

2010-10-09T12:29:00.001+08:00

i like books better :/

day 12| a song to describe the weather or your current mood

2010-10-09T12:29:00.000+08:00

note to self - from first to last describes my current mood..

day 07| something that turns you on

2010-10-09T12:28:00.002+08:00

boys.. um bad boys.

day 08| favorite fruit

2010-10-09T12:28:00.001+08:00

durian!

day 09| something you’re looking forward to

2010-10-09T12:28:00.000+08:00

a camp over @ vietnam hellyeh

day 06| someone that makes you really happy

2010-10-09T12:27:00.000+08:00

the key word is makes. i guess it'd be... a secret i'll nvr tell.

day 05| something that makes you smile

2010-09-26T18:42:00.000+08:00

what makes me smile? i dnt knw.. i guess i make myself smile :')

day 02| how you feel about God and religion

2010-09-25T18:54:00.002+08:00

i'm srsly not that pious of a person. i'm nt a good person, either. bt all i knw is i knw thr's only one god fr me. i believe in my god and my religion although i may not be pious. i do respect my religion and my god and that's all thr is to feel.

day 03| Describe what you did today; did you like it?

2010-09-25T18:54:00.001+08:00

so tday, i headed to sch and was almost late. everything was alright till the last period when i found out i had stained my skirt due to the arrival of my period. i was totally pissed to the point of no return and headed to the toilet and tried to get rid of the stain.. i had to endure the shame it had brought me as i trudged back into class.. i shouted at an innocent classmate and felt rlly srry :/ so i cabbed back home with two of my girls and met the love of my life. we spent time together and honestly, it was one of the best fridays i've ever had in 2010! ;) by 5PM, we decided to make our way out to tampines to kill our cravings fr LJS yum yum :P we had to rush though because i had to be in school by 7PM. once i reached school, i heard the principle talking abt our results and how parents shld treat us children as prisoners fr these 3 weeks.. blah blah blah saw my results and felt my heart ache. met my high end lover and we trained back home. once in pasir ris, we walked back home and had our moment. i told my mother abt my result and studied till about 11PM.. i didn't like the day.. i loved it. and i love you, high end lover :)

day 04| four moments that changed your life

2010-09-25T18:54:00.000+08:00

1) 041108 - the day i lost myself to somebdy worthy of me

2) 2 yrs back when i found out i dropped to the NA stream

3) 240910 - the day i told myself to change my living habits

4) the moment he left, earlier this yr

day 01| ten things about yourself.

2010-09-22T17:33:00.000+08:00

1) i am 153cm short and i rlly rlly rlly wna grow taller.

2) i am a bookworm.

3) i love the english language so so much.

4) i hate liars, alot.

5) i am sensitive.

6) i am outspoken and rlly loud.

7) i tweet alot!

8) i like cupcakes bcse they make me smile!

9) i am pretty much random and annoying, mehehe.

10) i am peevish, most of the time :/

2010-09-20T17:04:00.000+08:00

i'll be back, kitties :)

2010-09-07T18:39:00.000+08:00

HI! ;)

alright so life's been chaotic, for me. i've been on an emotional roller coaster ride and thank god x100000 that i'm finally feeling normal. it's the 7th of September today and it's the eve of my birthday. i will be turning 17 tmr and i'm not rlly that excited.. bt hey, it's going to be a step closer to being 18, right? mehehe :)

i've been srsly emotional.. like i said above, i've been on a MAJOR emotional roller coaster ride. i wasn't myself most of the time but it's safe to say that i'm back right nw. so hi? hehehe it's currently 6.42PM and i'm waiting fr the dishes to be heated up! raya's in 3 days?! OMG it's like super fast pls!! i'm nt ready yet -_-'

ok i'm turning 17 in less than 6 hours! love you xx

2010-08-30T18:44:00.000+08:00

SINGLE = MINGLE = HVE LOTS OF FUN HEHEHEHE

2010-08-27T18:13:00.000+08:00

it's 5.53PM on a friday and i'm right here.. blogging fr the 3rd time this week. gd improvement, eh? hm, i've totally gt ntg to blog abt..

ok so my prelims hve just started and 4 papers are down alr and that is eng, mt, ss and maths.. idk what to say abt all of those papers bcse i didn't actually study fr all of them.. all i studied over the weekend were bio and fnn.. i'm nt a big fan of ss so it can jolly well fk off.. maths paper 1 was so bloody difficult!! paper 2? it was another killer -.-' english was alright. i wrote on death.. paper 2 was shit, btw.. mt? it's also another killer and yeh i was thanking god fr my b3 at that point of time..

so um, i'm just done with crying.. my eyes feel so so so weird. it's like i'm going blind or smtg.. i'm done with crying. i'm done with hurting. i'm done with everything.

i'm srry i'm not unappreciative of yr efforts. i'm srry i never cared. i'm srry i'm egoistic. i'm srry i'm selfish. i'm srry bt you deserve better than this little bitch. i'm always hurting you. i know you deserve better than me. i'm nt worth it. i'm just nt worth yr life.

even though i nvr appreciated, cared or thought of yr feelings.. i'm very sure i loved you. i loved you so much i had to nt appreciate, care or think. i loved you so much i only thought of protecting you. i loved you so much i expected better out of you. bt i guess all of that wasn't enough fr you.

i'm nt contented? mirror yrself. you nvr think abt hw much i've sacrificed fr you. you only think of yrself, what you did and what you went through.

only you cried for us. only you appreciated. only you cared. only you thought of me. only you loved me. only you.

this relationship isn't abt us, anymre. it's only abt you doing the right things. and me? i'm all abt the wrongs in this relationship.

it's nt like i've nt tried to keep us going. i've tried and tried bt it still boils dwn to one thing.. and that is things are just nt working out fr us. at least, it's nt working out fr me. and i can't deal with it.

i can't deal with having to fake my smiles bcse being me, i obviously harp on issues fr quite a long time until the ache in my heart subsides.. bt i doubt you'd understand. yre asking me to change? well if i change, yre nt loving me fr me anymre.. would you like that?

i wnt be the same anymre. i wnt be who you used to knw. all i'd be is the new 'me' you WANT me to be. i dnt want that. i dnt want to change. i tried bt it didn't work out fr me.

well, i'm just srry fr hurting you, making you cry and everything else. i'm just srry fr everything.. i didn't mean to hurt you. i only did everything i did bcse i merely loved you. i didn't knw it was wrong.. i didn't knw it'd turn out to be this way.

i hate this. i hate crying over ntg. just know this, will you? i loved you. a whole lot.

"apa yg ku rasakn ini.. persembahan untuk dirimu.. mencintaimu tk mengenal waktu, tk mengenal puitis. hanya tulusnya hati.."

rmb this? i dwnloaded this song fr you back in 2008..

haziq, i loved you so much bt i doubt you'll ever knw.

xx, nabila

2010-08-25T18:38:00.000+08:00

hi!! i'm currently watching c murda frm one moment of glory (OMG fr short)! i cannot get enough of him hehehehe he's too good! i'm being serious -.-'

anyway, tday's been alright. it's wenzday tday and i had my oral exam earlier on. it was ........ i'll tell you how it went ok? first, i spent 10minutes preparing fr it in the rm. the moment i saw the picture i went like "WHAT THEEEE???" so much fr the topic being easier then yesterday's -..-' so i talked to myself fr the whole of that 10minutes and sat outside the rm fr another 15minutes bcse obviously raymie had ALOT to say. haha so i was like sitting like an idiot outside the rm watching hw it went fr raymie and i guess it was good? so he then signalled fr me to head in and my voice was shaking when i greeted them -_- so then he asked me to start reading whenever i felt like i was ready.. SO I READ....................... then i ended reading and he immediately asked me this..

"is english yr native language?" and i was speechless. in fact i must have looked like "WHAAAAAAAAT?" so he then said "i mean, do you speak english at home?" and i was like "yes?" the O.O face was plastered on my face and he started to say "oh no no it's ok it's just that you read well"

and i'm like YAH RIGHT AS IF WHY YOU ASKING ME THIS!!! DO I SOUND SO BLOODY FOREIGN? DO I NT SOUND LIKE A TYPICAL SINGAPOREAN SHLD? DO I SOUND LIKE I AM FAKING AN ACCENT? ;( WHAT!!!

so i was rather distracted... and then i started talking shit right after that awkward moment. i guess i pretty much screwed the conversation part up. i mean, what the hell? he asked me a total of 4 questions!! is he even supposed to ask me THAT much questions? i totally screwed up the last question.. he was asking me abt what we can do to involve the public in leading a healthy lifestyle (or smtg like that) and i was taken aback! i didn't knw what to say so i was like muttering in incomplete sentences.. I SCREWED UP.. BIG TIME!!

i hope they hve mercy on me. it's nt like i did badly fr every question, right? OMG i'm srsly bothered!! ok i shall stop this nonsense.. what's done cannot be undone, right? it's no point crying over spilt milk. ok i shall shut up......

LAST LAST! OMG I SCREWED UP LA!!!!!!!!!!! BT!! i'm proud of myself fr nt mentioning any singlish hehehe ;) ok that was only to comfort myself HAIS

ok it's almost time fr break fast right nw!! i'm gna get ready fr break fast! and a reminder to myself: drink at least 4 glasses of water!! i feel dehydrated meowwww gdbye darling xx

2010-08-24T19:56:00.000+08:00

hi, i'm bored so i'm gna fill this space of mine up ;)

hello darling, i've missed you so much. thr's so much i'd like to say bt as usual, i dnt knw hw to put it into words.. it's just so difficult to express what you feel. it's meant to be felt and nt said. get what i mean? or like my darling dede wld say. do you 'catch the ball?' i'd very much love get O's over and done with so i'd hve time fr other things and other.. people like my baby..

hi baby, i've missed you. i knw i've given you a truck full of attitude and MORE attitude bt i'm sure yre doing alright. i knw yre used to it alr, right? teehee i'd love to apologise bt you knw hw egoistic i can be... nvm i'd apologise anyway. i'm srsly srry fr the nights you've spent crying over what i've said. i knw i'm evil and heartless and cruel and everything else. all of that makes me a monster bt i'm a beautiful monster ;) HAHA ok maybe nt so beautiful bt.. at least i'm yr monster!!

ok enough of mushy talk!!

MY BIRTHDAY'S IN 14 DAYS! i shld feel.. excited!! RIGHT? bt i'm nt THAAAAT excited. i'm only like 30% excited bcse i'm turning 17!! bt then why shld i be excited?!!! i'm growing old! MEOWWW SO SAD RIGHT >(

hehe i apologise fr making you feel neglected darling! i've srsly gt no time fr you! in fact, i'm supposed to be studying nw, damn it #@%$

i dnt feel like studying hehehehehehe so i'm gna study tmr instd! YAY ME!!

OK BYE ;)

2010-08-23T16:50:00.000+08:00

alright, i'm back fr another entry.. i'm not exactly in the mood right nw. in fact, i've nt been in the mood since a week ago. the whole of last week's been shit and i too felt like shit throughout! all i did to occupy myself is sleep! ok i did some studying too bt yehhhh i slept most of the time..

tday, school was alright -.- lessons were dry bt i'm alr used to that lol -..- i've gt ntg to blog about la!!

BYE

2010-08-16T18:24:00.000+08:00

it's been SO long since i've last blogged, right? thr's actually ntg to blog abt, rlly.. it's like the 5th day of fasting and i'm so weak! oh yes, nt to mention sleepy!! i've been sleeping late and i dnt like it! it's making me feel so grumpy and i slept in sch just nw, wtf much? meowwww me so bored!!

it's only 6.26PM right nw and i'm waiting fr the clock to strike 7PM. i need to prepare fr break fast and yep it's only me and adik. AGAIN. it's like we're loners and we hve no family to break fast with. lol i'm kidding. i kind of like the peace and quiet i hve at hme. bt i hate it when my brother finds fault with me -.-

i've been feeling quite peevish these days.. could it be that it's alr on it's way? gahhh i've ntg else to blog abt. i'm serious =/

ok bye darling

2010-08-08T11:49:00.000+08:00

it's been six days nw that i've not blogged in you!! O M G i'm srsly very srry abt nt updating you like i used to but i've smtg to confess.... i am so sick and tired of blogging! HAHAHA ok yay i've confessed -..-' but moving on!! i'm in the mood to blog hehehehe ok let's start!

so my week totally sucked balls! monday - thursday was so very boring and i was so tired!! bt friday was tha bomb! ZE BOMB! we had this national day celebration cum sports carnival held in school and guess what i wore on my delicate little feets?! GUESS!! lol ok i wore my brother's airmax!! can you believe it?! HAHAHAHA i couldn't believe it myself lol ok so i went to school and we were all playing hardcore captain's ball! we thrashed the staff but lost to 4T1 and 4N2. i didn't mind losing to 4N2 bcse we had like sportsmanship or whatever the fk it was bt losing to 4T1?! i cannot acccept it!!!! 6-4 kns! thanks to the bloody lousy referee fr asking ask to keep starting in the middle everytime the ball goes out of the court -.- WASTE OF TIME MAX! ok whatever about that Zzz then we had like dunking!!! i dunked mr s!!! and of course ms g! but i didn't want to? it's just that she asked? hahahaha but mr s was funny!!! li yan donated like 50bux fr the whole of 5N1 to dunk mr s! TALK ABT BEING GENEROUS!!! hahahahaha ok so we were like released after being given fans! OMG SO CUTE!!! I THANK THE GENIUS WHO SUGGESTED GIVING FANS AS DOORGIFTS MAN!

hehe so i went home and cleaned fr a little bfre heading out to meet some of my darlings for lunch! seoul garden disappointed me =[ BUT I SAW SOME THINGS that were funny ttm! it tickled my funny bone like THISSSSS much! HAHAHAHAHA i kept laughing!!! SO FUNNY! ok hehehehe then we trained to simei and had han river instead. it was alright la. but what the hell was the 10bux fr!!! service charge? WHAT SERVICE?!?! i was serving myself lo! i shld have given the 10bux to myself! nabeh cheat our money!! ok then i bussed to my grandaddy's hse to fetch my sister and headed hme! wanted to sleep but had to wait fr my sister to end her bloody tuition which took FOREVER to end! i slept in the end hehe that was MY friday =]

yesterday was saturday and all i did was go to my uncle's hse to watch sayang you can dance! IT IS SO CUTE!!! the movie was a must watch! i wna watch again! ='[ mia and remy reminds me of me and <3 hehehe so cuuuuuuuteeeeee ok i'm gna stop blogging alr haha i think i've blogged enough!

question, do you miss me, blogger? HAHAHA

2010-08-02T22:12:00.000+08:00

Tday's monday and i can't help bt just say oh shit! It's bloody monday, again! I hate mondays. I've always hated them.. Bt i hate tday the most. This is the worst monday ever! hate this day ttm! 2nd aug 2010 sucks!

And to whoever who kicked my shoerack, dnt make me find out who you are and kick yr bloody head ok? I fking cannot tolerate this kind of bullshit. Brain like small kid -.-

UNFOLLOW ME IF YOU MUST! I dnt give a flying fkkk

2010-07-30T20:58:00.000+08:00

yay i like the template. plain.. just like me =]

2010-07-25T12:52:00.000+08:00

hihihi where got time to emo?! hehehe i'll update soon ok? now i'm so fking hungry and tmr i'm gna attack seoul garden!!!!!!!! muahahaha mad craving fr it ok so bye darling i'll update you soon mehehehe love you!

formspringME OR twitter

=]

waiting.

2010-07-12T18:29:00.000+08:00

Here I am, waiting, yet again. He has not been truthful to me and I know it. My gut tells me that he has been lying to me and I am waiting for him to tell me the truth. No matter how hard I try to believe his words, I just cannot seem to. I have tried but it seems like I have been the only one trying to make things work. He has not played a part in this relationship of ours or maybe it is just that I demand too much out of this relationship. It is not about us or we. It is only about me, ever since before and even right now. I am only waiting for him to involve more of himself if he still wants to be with me.

I am going through this mental torture, single handedly. Nobody will understand the pain I have to put up with. I do not want to lose him but I know I am and I will, slowly. This is just as I expected but this is not what I have asked for. I have put up with many lies and although I hate liars, I keep giving him the ‘second’ chance. I not only give him the ‘second’ chance. In fact, I have given him the ‘third’, ‘fourth’ and ‘fifth’ too. I have been giving him more chances than he probably deserves but I am still waiting for him to make full use of that supposedly last chance, to make things work. To make us work. I’m still waiting but I do not know for how long more will I be able to withstand this torturous act of neglect. I feel neglected when I should not be. I am still waiting for him to come clean with me. I am still waiting for him to mature and become the man he should be.

He has changed and I’m waiting for that boy, who once, swept me off my feet, to return. I long for him to come back and make me feel special like he used to. He used to be that boy who made me swoon all night long. He used to be that boy who made me smile in my sleep. He used to be the reason for my smile. He used to be the reason for my joy. He used to be and that saddens me because they are just ‘used to be’s. He has been the best part of my life. He has been the one who was always there for me, come what may. He has been the one. Unfortunately for me, they are all ‘has been’s. He no longer is the same boy I once knew. He no longer leaves a spark when he speaks. I am still waiting, though. I am waiting for him to come back.

I have heard one too many lies to last me a lifetime. I am waiting for him to just tell me the truth. I am waiting for him to muster enough courage to just tell me what he did wrong. I feel like a fool waiting for him. I have spent days and nights wondering about his misdeeds. I do not mind him making mistakes. I just mind the fact that he has been lying to me when he knows I hate being lied to. I am prone to pardon him too easily but this time, I hope for him to realise what he has done wrong before I actually do. I am waiting for him to change. I am waiting for him to stop deceiving me. Maybe this is not love but just an infatuation but I do not mind whatever it is as long as he changes, at the end of the day. I will wait, even if it takes me nowhere.

I wonder if I will ever get tired of waiting. I wonder if all the time spent on waiting is worth it. I am slowly losing faith because it has been so long but it is funny how I am still right here, waiting for something to occur. I am waiting for him to change even after all these years of sorrow and pain. I am still standing strong, just waiting. Maybe I am just being plain silly but I am still waiting.

xx jaja

2010-07-12T10:20:00.000+08:00

hey, i'm back for another entry since i'm dying of boredom right here, in class. we're having elective and as usual, we are to start on our coursework (like as if we're all so guai to do it bahaha) -_-' so i'm bored and i've decided to blog about my boring life.. be prepared to fall asleep, dearest readers.

i'm feeling so annoyed. i've added this bitch more than 6 times on facebook but she's been rejecting my request and i don't know why! it's so fking annoying when i want to ask her stuffs but she won't let me. it's either she's guilty as charged or i'm not that popular of a human being to be on her friend list. fk you bitch. it's 2010. if you're that big of a minah, ACCEPT MY FKING REQUEST ok?

kanasai. i've been crying for nights and i don't think anything's ever gna make this right again. i feel cheated but i'm even more pissed that i'm being lied to. or so i think. but i know it. you are lying to me. i just have this feeling in me. i hate being lied to. stop lying, please.

i'm trying so hard to contain myself. i hope to not let my tears fall again. i've had enough. my head is telling me to stop but my heart tells me to go on. fk you. i hate you.

bye xx

2010-07-10T18:00:00.000+08:00

i don't know what else to say to you. i'm giving up on us, for real. i hate liars. i hate lies. i hate being lied to. but ironically, i love the way you lie. i just love how you do it. thanks for breaking my heart, again. i'll never ever forgive you.

anyway hi, i'm currently rushing through this entry because i'm heading out! i need some fresh air to breath in and i'm bored just sitting at home, doing nothing! this is exhausting... so today? i cried ate and attempted to sleep but didn't happen anyway so yah that's all i did. alot has happened and it's already july! woop 2 more months to my birthday ='D

argh ok i'm actually not in the mood to blog so i'll do it some other time!

i'm missing orange =/

2010-07-03T16:02:00.000+08:00

i'll update when i feel like it k bye

2010-06-27T11:50:00.000+08:00

hey babe, good morning! it's already 11.50AM and i've been awake since 10+! i know it's been so long since my last update and yeh now i'm back for another entry =D

so the entire week was guuuud for me because it managed to plaster a smile on my face! i spent the week with my beloved and babygirls =D super awesummmm!!! teehee went karaoke-ing with the girls and had the time of our lives! ok school's starting tmr and i'm not prepared omg Zzz

i'll update again with pictures ok?! for more updates check out my twitter!!! (that is if you can, bahahaha)

2010-06-17T20:54:00.000+08:00

hey babe! i'm backkkkkkkkkkkk =D

okay so i didn't blog yesterday because i was having the time of my life with baby teeheehee!!! bahahaha so i guess we spent the whole day together and i loved the day so much. i bet you loved the day too, right b? 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12!!!!!!!!

today sucked =( i didn't get to meet baby because his encik is such a fucked up fatty who's short! bluek kepada kau gemok!!! kay hehehe so anyway i had moodswings and baby had to endure it... hehe sorry baby i tak sengaje but oh wells =P

alright i'm downloading songs for papa now. i have to part with my baby (mp3) because papa wants to borrow it! he lost the charger + usb for his mp3 so i'm gonna lend him mine.. how am i to sleep for 1 week!? =( takpe la, sayang papa punya pasal.... hehehehe! okay i'll blog again soon alright?

luv you luvlock, goodnight xx

2010-06-15T12:58:00.000+08:00

hey babe, i'm feeling like shit (AGAIN). i didn't blog yesterday so here goes nothing...

i woke up extremely early thinking i'd call him to talk to him over the phone because we're like deprived of contacting each other.. so i woke up at about 8AM and called him. he was like 'eh asl bangun siang nah' (CB AKU BANGUN UNTUK KAU, KAU TANYE ASAL AKU BANGUN SIANG NAH) and he was about to play soccer. so we hung up and i was left to occupy my time ON MY OWN. i watched gg online and played games on apple. so he called me afterwards for like 10 seconds telling me he wanted to bathe first. then why the hell didn't you go and bathe first before calling me? so aku mengamok sendiri skejap la -.- then i tried calling him after like 20minutes but no, he didn't answer. i called him for more than an hour but he didn't answer to any of my calls.. so i had my breakfast on my own when he called me.. i fucking blew up and hung up. then he texted to say he was going for lunch. so i cooled myself down AND tried calling him again afterwards.. DIA MASEH TAK ANGKAT!!!! buto aku paling benci org tak tau angkat telifon -.- gi tanam tu hp kan lebeh mulia! so he was like 'i'll make it up to you' and 'it will not happen again' -.- so he "SURPRISED" me -.- okay whatever about that. the ending of the day sucked just as much. i was merely browsing through his itouch when i saw pictures of HER in it. that didn't piss me off as much la.. but then i saw some other girl's picture in it as well. and i think he gave me a reason that was so fucking bullshit to the core, as to why her picture was in there. kepala otak kau fikir aku budak kecik pe sial? and as for her pictures, seriously, kalau kau sygkan budak tu, kau tkmu nak terhegeh hegeh nan aku. i thought this was only an act? yg dia nak suroh kau letak gmbr dia dlm itouch tu apehal? mcm si gemok tu. kau yg suroh dia send gmbr kat kau nya itouch pe. ape stim si shasha tu nak suroh letak gmbr kat kau nya itouch kalau kau tk suroh? nak sedapkan hati dia? nak emphasize on 'loving her' mcm aku suroh? kepala buto bobal tkyah world la haziq -.- dah la si hazel tu klua salah timing -.-' time aku nan dia tgh gaduh depan pintu, dia mau tersengeh sengeh nan aku. muke bochui sia paiseh nampak dia -.- buto nya pmpn -.-'

so um yeah, that carried on till like 2AM in the morning when i told him to fuck off my life. even his bunkmate thought i was HER. sume saket dia pe sia? gi buat rolling ah -.- yeh that was it and i slept afterwards..

today i woke up late, on purpose. i feel so fucking good because i ignored his annoying calls. i'm lazy to cook rice bleargh but i'm hungry. how? i miss orange. he has seriously fucked off for good. selalunya kite gaduh, dia fuck off satu hari aje. skrg dah nak masok 4 hari dia dah fuck off. HAIS rindu kau bodoh.

i'm so fucking bored right now. might be heading out later to kakak it's house again because mak's cooking mee teochew? OR WHATEVER IT IS CALLED! but it's nice :) aku lapar so aku rase aku nak masak nasi neh skrg. kay bye xx

BTW TWITTER PERANGAI MCM MAKNYA!!!!!!!!!

2010-06-14T01:29:00.000+08:00

hi b i love you :)

2010-06-13T15:47:00.000+08:00

hey babe, i'm currently feeling crap all over again. last night HAD to happen, right? damn it, seriously. damn it :(

i'm sorry but i guess we're not to contact through text/call b. we'll only contact through twitter okay? i'm sorry because it seems like the whole world is against us. i'm sorry because nobody seems to approve of us anymore. i'm sorry we have to wait. i'm sorry but i do not want to hurt her anymore. i cannot take the risk. i'm sorry but i love you.

#nowplaying sampai menutup mata - acha septriasa

tiada dusta sumpahku cinta sampai ku menutup mata.. cintaku sampai ku menutup mata.

:'( blog later xx

2010-06-12T16:47:00.000+08:00

hey babe, i'm back for another entry and don't worry, this time i'm not feeling like crap OR shit. in fact, i'm feeling A WHOLE lot better. and it's all thanks to one person that i'm currently feeling this way.

it's not orange. i told him to fuck off my life for good if he's going to continue playing the popping in and out of my life game with me. i'm sick and tired of having to wait and fight all the bloody time. twice's annoying the shit out of me. i told him to leave me alone but he just doesn't get it. boys are stupid, right? i blew e off the moment he talked to me last night, in fb. he called me 'sombong' -.- like as if i care, eh?

it's him. the one i've been crying for. hey you, i miss you. and i know it was you who tagged me!!! passerby la konon. sepak dahi you please! it was seriously worth the 2 hours of tears and confession. whatever it is, i'm sorry :'(

nobody approves of you anymore but i don't care. we'll make it through, right? and please, don't break her heart so fast :/ it's not fair for her, you know? i feel bad. YOU should feel bad too.

alright time to head off right now. he's not replying my tweets :/

xx

2010-06-11T21:58:00.000+08:00

Hey babe, i'm still feeling like crap. My ex has found someone new and.. I'm not taking it to well? Hais i myself don't know why.. I'm blogging with apple, right now. Feeling like shit. I hope he's happy. I guess he's better off with her. I guess his words were merely sweetnothings. I'm such an idiot to have believed his words. I truly believed there would be no one else to love after me. I'm naive. Hais i'll blog tomorrow or something.. I'm waiting for my mcspicy! So much for going on a diet eh, ja? Can't help but eat in times like these!! I need to seek food for emotional comfort! :(

2010-06-10T16:21:00.000+08:00

hey babe, i'm feeling fucked up. i don't know why he's still on my mind. i thought i've pushed him out of my head but i guess he's still there, somewhere.. i'm feeling so fucking depressed. i've been crying the whole of today. and to make it worst, i had to order macs and watch a hindi movie with the siblings. this reminded me of the old times.. except now, he's not here with me. he's not here for me to lie on after my meal. he's not here to wipe my tears away from my eyes. he's just not here anymore. i hate him. i hate him, i really do.. i just don't know why it's him that i've been thinking of these days. i can accept the fact that he's gone. i guess i just am trying to deal with it. i'm dealing with being lonely. at least, i'm trying. my life isn't the same anymore and i don't know why i'm letting this affect me so much. i was so sad i had to cry in the toilet in silence because i didn't want to let my siblings know that i was crying. i think i miss him. missing doesn't equate to wanting him back in my life. can't you just miss somebody? you can, right? because i am and i can't deny it. i can't lie to myself. but i do hate him. i hate him to the core. to the maximum. i've tried and i've tried to get you off my mind but i'm just unable to. maybe it'll take more time.. i've just got to keep on waiting. but hey, i.. just miss you. that's all.

so what did i do the whole of today? twice came to give me ice cream. it was supposed to make me feel better but i guess i ended up feeling ten times worst. thanks for the ice cream, twice. but i'm sorry.. we just can't. i saw his fb status and felt the pinch. yes, i did. i don't know why i'm so fucking 'terase' these days, hais. but then i saw his tweet, he said he was relentless and missing some baby of his. then i saw the status about 'disrupting people's peace and putting in new storylines in jeopardy is selfish! youre chipped off the old block, bitch!' (or smth like that) i wonder what i did to be called a bitch? as i was saying, i've been feeling a little bit too 'terase'-ish these days.. so i can't help but think that it was for me :'( fuck man, this feeling is so... annoying!!!

anyway, i've been thinking.. have i been using orange to get over him? i don't know if this is just an infatuation orrrrr? i don't want to think about it. it's making my brain ache even more! especially when we've been fighting alot lately. fuck you, orange.

okay i'll be meeting mama later. we're going to the tampines night market! i hope that'll make me feel better. hais, i don't know what to say anymore. sometimes mama makes me feel like i don't belong here. it's not that i don't love her. i love her too much and that's why i've been listening to her. i do not want to commit anymore sins but... hais sometimes i feel like i want to move out of here once i'm 18. kadang kadang, bukan salah aku pon aku terbabit. membebel aje.. hais, ape nak jadi?

:'(

1

2010-06-09T18:51:00.000+08:00

hey babe, since i've decided to start over, you're going to be the new place i'm going to rant at :D

i know i've yet to edit your skin and all that is needed to be done just yet but just hold on a little longer will you? i'll be back for you, i promise.

p/s hey babe, i know you're busy but i just wanted to let you know that i've missed you. i'll be waiting for you babe. thank you and you know i love you, right? i truly do.

goodbye for now luvlock xx

apple

2010-06-05T21:06:00.001+08:00

so, today papa got me an iphone and i named her apple :') thank you for spoiling me, papa. you know i love you.

lots of love, little brat xx

2010-06-04T18:55:00.001+08:00

2010-05-28T13:21:00.002+08:00

hi, i'm still awake at this ungodly hour of the wee morning because i can't fucking sleep :( i guess it's cause i've slept earlier on in the evening being the lazy pig that i am. hm, i'm fucking warm right now and i'm blaming the weather.. argh i've got nothing to blog about! SERIOUSLY!!! oh yeh, i went out earlier.. to see rayyan! it made me happy for like 30 minutes only :'( then my whole night was cocked up and still cocked up. don't feel like doing anything hais! kay then i left my specs there yeh great job, ja the blindfuck.

cb mt paper on monday goodluck siol kau ja

/edited.

my blog's dead alr la go away

2010-05-19T21:38:00.001+08:00

hi, i changed my blogskin today. and you know what? i've been pee-ing. ALOT.

2010-05-17T19:05:00.003+08:00

hiya, it's me again and i'm back for another entry. i'm sorry for neglecting you. i'm sorry for the lack of updates. but seriously? there's nothing to update about. my life's a total bore and you gain nothing by reading this online journal of mine. well, are you still considered an online journal of mine? i don't even update you as often as i used to? lol whatever.... i'm here now, right? that's all that matters.

i'm hungry :(

bleargh, time for proper updates! i did well for my mt prelim muahaha i hope i'll fare as well for my mt paper this 31st :/ okay wish me luck because i seriously need it! hm, english? i got like okay marks and i'm unhappy with it. things are just not working out and i'm not giving a damn. bleargh i've yet to finish my planning!!! kill me.

things have been pretty rough but it's okay. i'm over it. no more distractions, jaja! time for you to shineeee right now and not weep in despair, get it? lol it's okay if you people don't. okay 2 more days, ja! be patient! wait for 2 more days before deciding on anything!

leave me alone. that's what i need the most right now. please.

2010-05-11T19:44:00.003+08:00

FUCK U NO-LIFER

/edited

hi, darling. you're like the only place i've yet to vent my unhappiness at! okay so, today's a seriously BAD day. it was a bad hair day. it was a bad mood day. it was a bad everything day. it just was a bad day. hm, so let's get straight to the point of blogging, alright?

as soon as i reached home, i switched on the lappy and headed to the toilet to freshen up and things like that.. and when i was typing my email add for msn, i realised that it was you.......@hotmail.om -.- so i was like 'ooops i forgot the 'c'' -.- so i pressed the letter 'c'. and again.. and again... and AGAIN!!! -.- chibai, it didn't work! so i started pressing 'v' and 'b' -.- when i pressed 'b', it went something like this, 'bcbcbcbcccccccc' all the fucking way -.- ALL THE FUCKING WAY!!! and i was like wtf?! -.- this caused my mood to be fucked up down side back front la nbcb!

i so fucking want to do my planning but thank god for the spoilt 'c' -.- it totally ruined my mood for coursework! i feel like shit. so my whole day was... ruined? i ended up using the computer instead of the lappy.. okay so whatever..

i got okay marks for mt prelim. i hope ms k comes tomorrow. i so want to know how i fared for my english prelim..

there's nothing else to blog about. goodbye, darling.

2010-05-10T19:12:00.000+08:00

i feel like pee-ing again. and this feeling sucks.

bored

2010-05-08T13:42:00.003+08:00

alright, i'm just done with vacuuming -.- and changing my blogskin. like it? well, i love it! and that is all that matters..

i'm currently blogging because i'm waiting for time to quickly, or rather, slowly, pass by. i'll be heading out with baby later. he's only going to reach at about 4PM? so i'll probably watch my show or read my book afterwards. i have yet to think about what to wear.

okay whatever, i don't know what to blog about. blog soon, bye!

2010-04-28T17:29:00.004+08:00

hey, i'm back for an entry although in the last entry, i did mention that i was going to 'AWOL AH' -_- screw that. i miss blogging. i've missed you, paranoia. well, i still do.

okay, so today's a wednesday. the day's been pretty boring. i've had lots of laughters in school thanks to my darling classmates (i mad love all of you kay!) and uhhh i've been taking the bus to school these days (excluding this morning, thanks!) instead of cabs hehe yay me or what??? :P i took the cab to school today because i was late and yeah, i wasn't in the mood to do things fast and so i took my time in getting ready for school. so i reached school early and did my homework -_- hehe then the rest of the day was a major bore -.- had english remedial after school and yay ms k praised me :P tell me something i don't know please? hehehe kay i shall stop being so boastful! it's bad, tsk.

cabbed back to pasir ris because i had to run an errand for mama. it looked like it was going to rain but it didn't -.- or maybe not yet or something? i feel like doing my homeworks, tonight. maybe i should. it's been looooooooong -_-

i've been a lazy bum. and i've been having plenty of petty fights with the lover. it can be seriously annoying at times (or maybe all the time?) but it's inevitable! and we always have tiffs over trivial issues. bleargh i hate to fight with him because it can be hurtful. so so hurtful! but i guess he's my favourite mistake/pain because i cannot help but keep coming back to him for more. it's like i cannot stand it anymore but i'm still here. i love you la botak! stop making me angry already la!!! :'(

alright i guess i've blogged enough. i feel like changing my bloglink. it's been 2 years hmmm ~

2010-04-25T19:24:00.001+08:00

AWOL AH

2010-04-17T16:33:00.003+08:00

is blogger fucked up or something? because some of my past entries are no longer in my archives and i seriously don't remember deleting any of them! so is it just blogger being such a bitch to do such a thing or something else eh? -.-'

anyway, hi, it's a saturday evening and it's raining quite heavily right now. my initial plan was to bathe and read the malay newspapers but i doubt i'm going to -.- papa headed out to fetch mama and i hope she won't make too much noise when she gets back home.. i've got to bathe in a little while and the weather makes me want to sleep! Zzz

i spent my day by watching episodes of 90210 online hehehe my favourite!! :) okay then my sister was watching madu tiga and all of us were watching with her. now they're watching some show that i don't know of :/

i'm still mad about my lost entries!!! WHERE ARE THEY? for example, in july 2008, there are only entries from the 22nd to the 31st of july. mana yang lain?! -.- UGH!!!!! i'm going to bathe now la. bye!

2010-04-12T21:47:00.001+08:00

hi, it's the 12th of april today and i know i blogged earlier on in the day already but what's the harm in updating again, right? school was rather dry today but.. what's new right? i had a bio common test earlier on and i think i made quite a little bit of careless mistakes! =( haiiiii whatever about that laaaaaaa moving on!!!

today baby fetched me from school and we cabbed to tampines mall for late lunch :) we had a hard time deciding where to dine at since i wanted seoul garden so badly and baby wanted to eat swensens! hm, so i gave in since i knew i couldn't eat till i dropped dead and we had swensens. hehehe thanks for the treat today baby! i was seriously mad full! then mama asked me to help her get stuffs from kfc and we cabbed back home. thanks for the bag baby i love it sooooooo much. mama said it was nice and adik jealous hehehe. biasa bro!

so i reached home and washed up before sleeping till 7PM. then my baby berry gave me problems and i was mad angry! =( thank god for bbgeeks!!!!! i mad love you man thanks for the video! so now my bb's alright =D

haiyo i forgot to publish this entry hehehe kay bye nights!

11thhh

2010-04-12T10:26:00.002+08:00

i'm just glad yesterday's over. i never want to have a repeat of yesterday in my life, again. 11th of april was a day to remember, right b? oooooooookay let's just move on..

hi, i'm currently in school. i'm supposed to finish my dm but uhhhh forgetful girl over here forgot to bring her thumbdrive to school. so i'm currently doing nothing.. it's annoying me :(

i'm looking like a mad girl now with my hair all over the place but i just don't seem to give a fuck. people are giving me odd looks and all but i don't care. my life isn't as messed up as my hair okay? :)

alright i'll be off now! are we going out for late lunch today baby? mua is hungrehhhh :(

sunny sunday

2010-04-11T13:27:00.002+08:00

hi, i'm back for another entry. i'm currently listening to angels cry and feeling so Zzzz. i woke up earlier because mama was searching for my n97's charger.. so papa's using my n97 now and mama's going to get herself an iphone soon lol -_- and my aunt was over with my cousins lol. she got me my favourite lexus biscuits!! i can never get enough of them, i tell you!

so yesterday was -.-'''' to the maximum -.- i cooked and chicken pie was a failure but my grilled salmon was awesome!! no, wrong, it was better than awesome :P

okaaaaay that's all i wanted to blog about. pictures of my super fail chicken pie will be uploaded soon. oh yes, and of course my lovely grilled salmon too hehehehe :)

tgif

2010-04-09T21:32:00.000+08:00

hi, i'm blogging on a friday night instead of watching my chinese drama on tv. hm, that's cause my sister is having tuition and nobody is watching the tv outside so lol i'm not going to, either. i'm actually supposed to complete my decision making but i'm seriously distracted. i just have the urge to blog lol so here goes nothing :)

it's a friday today, like i mentioned above. every friday's meant to be a short day but my weekdays are packed with dsp(s) a.k.a remedials so my weekdays are never short and that includes friday :( i had mother tongue remedial today for 2 periods but thank god it ended at about 2.30PM. b lied to me again but what's new, right? he's always full of surprises and i'm already quite used to him lying :) so the bus ride home was mad awesome and i loved it. hehe had a nap till 6.30PM like that and smoked a little. hm, what else do i have to blog about eh? oh yes darling, i've already gotten myself my berry! i loooooooove u berry much teeheehee i'd like to thank papa for pampering me like crazy i love you papa :)

okay so i'm going to wake up early tomorrow. why? to head to the market to get myself ingredients! i'll be cooking tomorrow lol :P so should i cook chicken pie or grilled salmon? OR both? i've yet to decide bleargh! i hope i won't screw up tomorrow hehehe. heading to plaza sing next friday with the girls to get our stuffs from daiso yay yay shopping time! i also need to pay that shop at bedok inter a visit because i want to get myself decorations for my muffins lol shut up you people don't get what i'm talking about right? hehe i know :)

then again, i'm glad today's friday. it means it's the end of a stupid tiring week. april's been quite alright to me. it's not as bad as march was! i hate march to the maximum and i thank god that it's passed. it's already the 4th month of 2010 wow how time flies, right? i'll be 17 in 5 months time and i'm going to sit for my O's soon! i hope i made the right choice by coming back to sec 5 because i seriously do not want to end up as a failure. sia sia nak jadi doctor gila nyehaha!

okay things to do? 1) stop sighing. 2) stop swearing/cursing. 3) stop being so grumpy (if not stop at least cut down on being grumpy) 4) be happy (or at least try)

that's pretty much all. i'll blog again soon. and i want to thank you personally, here. i love the conversation we had yesterday and the bus ride earlier on. isn't this so much better? no fights no stress, just laughter. we do not need to fight ALL THE TIME just to show that we love each other, okay? it is seriously tiring and i'm sure you are tired of fighting as well. not fighting all the time doesn't equate to us not being deeply in love with each other, you know? i want more of last night and less of the previous nights we have had. i'd like to thank you for trying to make the effort. i'd also like to thank you for tolerating my attitude and putting up with my crap (although i know sometimes even you can't stand me lol). i've told you this but i'm going to to say it again. i'm not a good person. i know i am mean and selfish. i think of myself more than anyone else. i'm sorry i'm selfish and mean. but it's these imperfections that makes me, me :')

goodnight everybody. have a nice friday. just like i did :)
p/s i'm mad hungry ughhhhhhh

2010-04-07T19:24:00.002+08:00

i've decided to blog now because i'm transferring files from my (spoilt/sot) hp to the computer so i've got some time to spare. hm, today's already the 7th of april. i should be scared to death because my o's just around the corner. well, maybe not to all of you. but it is, to me. believe me, i've not even thought about studying for the past four months. i'm fucking lazy, i'm telling you. but that does not equate to me not studying, in school. i'm seriously not motivated at all. or maybe not yet? hm, i seriously do not want to fail my o's. i seriously do not want to give my parents another disappointment. i've disappointed them enough. but i'm really lazy to do homeworks! argh, i've got to start bucking the fuck up haiiiii omg the first paragraph of this entry is already so... despondent-sounding!

hm, anyway, i've not blogged (properly) for quite some time. told you i've been lazy, right? yeh, that's probably the main reason for my absence! haiiiii was supposed to have this dental appointment but it's being pushed forward to friday, 8.30AM -_- kay whatever, i'll get to skip maths lol shut upppp oh oh and hehehe my period's here! i hope there'll be lesser moodswings heh :)

that's all i can think of? i'm tired. i'll upload pictures soon or something kay? mua is lazehhhh :)

2010-04-05T18:59:00.002+08:00

it's funny how people can talk about other people and not reflect on themselves. period.

2010-03-30T19:47:00.000+08:00

PRETTY OR WHAT? I'M GETTING MYSELF ONE SOON (I HOPE!!!) IT LOOKS SO YUMMEH OMG :(

2010-03-28T20:45:00.002+08:00

omg, i'm bored. so fricking bored... what to do? blog lo -.-

hi, today i woke up at 10AM just to do some physics (-_-) i don't know why i was being so good but yeah.... afterwhich, i did some maths -_- then i was talking to mama and i guess i'm going to cook 6 dishes for execution. well, i'm not quite sure yet. i've to ask mrs kua about it. nyettt, i'm bored. tomorrow's monday :( school? i dread going to school so much!! :(

kay whatever la hor... i had tuition just now and it was good. lol that's all la kay i want to tumble now!

2010-03-26T20:33:00.001+08:00

i've been laughing to myself, reading my old tweets! i tweet about almost everything :| i think i tweet more than i blog (duh) i love tweeting. i love talking to myself.. and if i don't update my blog, you people can just go check out my twitter kay? most updates are there :)

anyway, i'm bored. so let's blog! hm, there's nothing much to say, actually. oh yes yes!! i passed my bio class test (on hereditary? or is it inheritance? OMG i forgot the topic!!) okay let's not use the term 'passed'.. how about aced? hehe i actually lied to mama saying i studied for it already but i didn't. but thank god i aced it. even ms grace was saying this must be my favourite topic hehehe. okay thank god for that! and oooh i passed the bio reap test as well.. alhamdulilah :) so lessons were rather dry today.. 2 periods of english omg i was going to die out of boredom, i tell you! -_- kay then school ended early and i headed back home straight. i took a short nap and headed out of the house by 5PM. i was being surprised with hot n spicy shaker fries (my craving!) and yeh, cabbed to tampines to wait for grandad and sister to come back home. hehe i had time to eat so i did and then 15 minutes later i was flagging a cab for ourselves. haiiiii now i'm rotting at home, reading my old tweets because i'm bored like that. mama's on her way home already and i'm feeling so sleepy! :(

bah, what should i do right now? i'm bored like mad :( i'm actually supposed to do my decision making now, bleargh. i'm seriously not in the mood for it, you know? baby's going to head out tonight (i think) and yeh, i guess i'm going to sleep early tonight.. about 10PM? after i watch my new favourite chinese drama! wufu is bloody cute, please?!

alright i think this entry is long enough to satisfy your hunger for stalking (my blog).. if you know what i mean, avid readers! :)

2010-03-25T13:35:00.003+08:00

hi people of the world. i'm currently blogging because i've got nothing better to do. yeh, i'm supposed to be on a hiatus, or something like that but i'm not. i'm not in school today.. wondering why? oh well, i wasn't feeling too good last night.. (and i overslept)

so i woke up early today. haiiiii i watched apa kata hati with the sister (who's not in school too) lol it's such a cute movie! i guess it's a movie marathon day for me, today. i'm bored to death. 2 hindustan movies are waiting for me to watch them!! but mama gave 'my name is khan' to her friend already so i guess i'll have to wait -.- and i'm trying to blog everything out, in full. no more 'pls' or 'u' for me! :(

i'll clean my hammies cage in the evening with the help of my sister, yay thank god for her! i've eaten already but i'm still feeling hungry. damn it! i can't help but feel hungry ALL THE TIME!!! does this only happen to me orrr? ~~anyway, deal with the super plain blogskin for now okay? i don't know what happened! :(~~ HEHE NOW IT'S BACK TO HOW I LIKE IT :D

haiiii i shall stop blogging already! life's super mundane, nyetttt!

2010-03-25T13:33:00.001+08:00

test?

2010-03-22T19:43:00.000+08:00

M.I.A for a while kay? :)

2010-03-19T08:58:00.003+08:00

*yawns* good morning, paranoia. it's a friday today and i'm not schooling. thank god for that. it's only 8.58AM. why am i up? blame mama for opening the door to my room so loudly. pfft! now i can't get back to sleep. and i am feeling.. hungry :(

okay so what's there to say? nothing much, really. i've been bored. it's been only school, school and more school. sometimes i feel like it's the wrong choice i've made, but then again, hey, it's MY choice. i made it so now, i've got to deal with it. whether i like it or not.

i've been keeping mum about my feelings. sometimes i just want to scream in people's faces. i just want to tell them to fuck off my life. but it's just so hard. everybody is selfish. if i want them out of my life, they might not want to actually be out of it. argh, the harsh reality.

i'm craving for spicy lontong goreng. hais :( just the thought of it makes me salivate! GAH

alright i've blogged enough. on random things and thoughts. time to head off now. i'm going to try and get back to sleep. hopefully.

2010-03-13T19:45:00.006+08:00

I MISS MY NAILS :( all my nails are short now, pfft

BAH don't have any more to upload, i guess. anyway i changed my blogskin alr hehe. can't wait for cinta ixora later tonight hehehehe i loooooove that show ttm!

today's a sleepy day. bleargh. i miss my babyyyyyy :(

2010-03-11T20:49:00.000+08:00

results suck. i think? anyway i won't be updating for quite some time (lol maybe) be back soon with a super long entry filled with more pictures alright? PROMISE MADE FROM ME TO U! :)

2010-03-07T20:16:00.003+08:00

hey. i've not been in the best of moods, lately. so i guess that explains the lack of updates. sorry darling.

i feel like shit. i feel like breaking down. i feel like shutting down, forever. maybe i'm not meant for this. maybe i'm not brave enough to face this pressure. maybe i'm just meant to be a failure all my life.

fuck this shit. i've been so emotional lately. i've been crying over the littlest things. i've been wanting to forget about school. i dread doing it. why should i continue doing this when i dread it so much? because i chose this path. and maybe, just maybe, i chose the wrong path.

i fucking failed all of my common tests except for maths. i passed for fnn overall but failed the paper itself. wtf ja, wake the fuck up. if i continue this, i'll be saying hi to the nitec courses in ITE next year when i was being offered HIGHER nitec courses the last year. OMG i do not want to make things hard for myself. where's my focus? WHERE?!

do i sound emo? well, i sound fucked up and mad to everybody else on this planet. i fucking blow my top over trivial matters and i do not like how i am now. fuck, pls be over soon. I MEAN REAL SOON. PLS!

let's just get back to my coursework.. tsk.

FTS FML FAOY!

2010-03-07T13:15:00.001+08:00

i'm just done with eating breakfast and am attempting to start on my coursework right now -.- i feel so lost!!! i don't know where to start till mama had to help me a little with the first question. hais, where should i start? WHERE?!

i'm not in the best of moods right now. blog later.

:)

2010-03-03T20:45:00.004+08:00

hey darling, i'm here to blog in you again! are you ready? LOL :P

hiiiiii, now's 8.46PM and i'm just done with cleaning my hammies cage :) i'm so tired!! today we did filing for mt, eng, ss and geog and i broke another nail!! yesterday i broke my right thumb's nail -.- now 3 nails are already broken. thanks alot, filing -.- i hate filing so much but whatever. remind me to hunt for a black thin file (for physics) kay? :D

yesssss we haven't had maths for 3 days now! math's teacher's sick. actually, ALOT of teachers are on mc due to falling sick. hais, how come when they don't want to be sick, they actually do fall sick.. but when i desperately want to fall sick, i can't and won't -.- FML what's up with my body man!? lol anyway it's already march eh omg o.o time is flyinggggg and i? i'm only sauntering -.-

i'm going to try to attempt to finish at least 1 geog essay by tonight.. i've still got a social studies project to complete and hunt for some papers which are not in my file (when they are supposed to be there) -.- WHERE ARE YOU, PAPERS?!?!!?!

kay hehe i think i've blogged enough. don't you think? but well, before i go.. here's a little something for my baby (who's still in the jungle right now)

hi baby (that is if you're reading this), today's the 3rd of march. i might not be able to wish you (by blogging) tomorrow because my schedule is so packed with school work that i hardly have time for myself :(

anyway, tomorrow's the 4th of march :) a day we celebrate and ought to remember :) it's our day tomorrow and i'd like to wish you a very happy 16th month, baby :) even though you're not physically here with me, i can feel your presence in my heart. there's never a time when you're not on my mind baby. you know how much i love you, right? i know you love me too :P teehee i miss you so much b please come back soon? :'(

lots of love, jaja :)

2010-03-02T16:28:00.002+08:00

i'm feeling so very tired. it's only 4.29PM now and i've yet to edit my cw -.- i've yet to finish 5 essays (geog + ss) and i've yet to do the speech (eng)!!! i feel like getting an mc for the rest of the remaining week. goodness, i dread school so much :(

i broke my favourite nail today while filing my papers. hais. my head is filled with so much thoughts but nope, it won't drive me crazy just yet, okay? :) and no, i'm not the suicidal type. i won't cut my wrists up and have an orgasm while watching blood ooze out of myself lol :P kay..... i shall stop blogging now. i'm tired :/

FML i don't know if i've made the right choice by coming back to sec 5. i seriously dread school.. hais.

2010-02-27T18:16:00.002+08:00

hi darling, it's 6.16PM on a saturday evening and i'm here to blog in you :)

i'm watching om shanti om right now on tv. hehe i love om shanti om!! made me cry like a zillion times :'( i love the story line hehe okay shut up already! uh anyway, what have i done so far? i have..... slept, ate, helped my brother with his planning, got paid 5 bux for it and yuuuup, that's all. tsk, i'm such a pig. i've yet to finish up the 3 essays i owe for geog -.- will do it later tonight after dinner, i guess. i'm feeling so hungry :(

i crave for beef prosperity. and it's all mama's fault. tsk :/ feel like baking tomorrow but i don't know. it depends on my mood. i feel like eating shepherd's pie!! but i also feel like baking cupcakes. tsk. it's exactly 1 week till i get myself an iphone. hehehehe i can't wait!

alright i'm tired of blogging alr lol bai :)

2010-02-23T19:15:00.001+08:00

okay my blogskin's finally changed!!! :D

will start studying for my fnn soon omg my brain is tired!! do you get me?! :(

2010-02-22T18:24:00.002+08:00

OMG!!!! i'm so sorry for neglecting you for such a long period of time, paranoia. it's been so long since i last updated, right? CHEH -.-''' to me it's long la kay! LOL

anyway it's not that i don't want to. it's just that my schedule's packed with ALOOOOOT of things -.-' seriously, you don't want to know. as usual, school sucks. i've been having moodswings lately. i got 19/25 for my geography test that i studied last minute for! HEHE so proud of myself because it's all based on memory work kay!! :D so we had um, maths common test just now and i hate sets!!!!! 7 marks leh omg my heart is aching :( bio test was kind of... alright? i didn't study for it! i was busy playing with raymie's guitar thingggg on his iphone lol shut me up somebody!

alright i'm finally done with my research!!! KAY NOT REALLY hehehehe only the interaction + interview (which i think i'm going to skip) left to be done! i hope i can finish it by tonight. i still got to clean my hammies cage (right after i publish this) and cook rice! OH YES! organise my file and do my maths + physics hw. yep busy busy busy girl tonight hehe kay bai!!! promise to update you with pictures soon alright?

xoxo, jafajafa :P

2010-02-18T21:12:00.001+08:00

OMG I'VE SIMPLY GOT NO TIME TO UPDATE YOU, DARLING PARANOIA!!! :'( i'll update you when i've got some time to spare alright?

2010-02-15T10:55:00.001+08:00

IT'S BEEN 2 DAYS. WHY ARE U KEEPING ME WAITING LIKE AN IDIOT WHEN U SIMPLY KNOW I HATE WAITING SO SO MUCH?! WHY!! I'VE BEEN SO GRUMPY AND IT'S ALL THANKS TO U! I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY THE FUCK UR HP IS BEING SWITCHED OFF UP TILL NOW? AND IT'S NOT LIKE U'RE IN CAMP?! FUCK LAAAAAA I HATE WAITING -.- U KNOW WHY? IT WILL ALWAYS WORRY ME -.- THANKS UH, THANKS SO MUCH.